5/27/09

The Curse of Cleveland Sports.

I’m not typically the type of person who is very superstitious. To me the whole idea of it is kind of childish. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll switch seats during a Cavs game for a little change of luck or lie to the wife and tell her the Browns only win when I watch the game at the bar, but that’s about the extent of my belief in superstition.

For arguments sake lets say its true that Cleveland Sports are cursed.

What exactly is a curse? Well according to Wikipedia:

A curse (also called execration) is any manner of adversity thought to be inflicted by any supernatural power, such as a spell, a prayer, an imprecation, an execration, magic, witchcraft, a god, a natural force, or a spirit.

The study of the forms of curses comprise a significant proportion of the study of both folk religion and folklore. The deliberate attempt to levy curses is often part of the practice of magic. In Hindu culture the Fakir is believed to have the power to bless and curse.


Cleveland hasn’t won a championship since the Browns won in 1964. So my feeling is the curse started sometime shortly after the 1964 football season. It couldn’t be the curse of Rocky Colavito, he was traded to Detroit in 1960. Could this be Jim Browns fault? He did shock everybody when he retired in 1965 to produce the World War II movie The Dirty Dozen. The timing works out, so it must be the curse of Jim Brown, right?

The next question I ask my self is how do you get rid of a curse? Boston apparently rid them selves of the Curse of the Bambino that plagued them for 86 years. How did they do it? How can Cleveland get rid of this curse?

1. Don’t Believe The Hype – This means as soon as all Cleveland fans believe that there is no such thing as a “curse” the “curse” will actually end! Sounds easy enough, right?

2. Consult A Shaman - Here we go. This sounds like a great idea. Shamans are able to communicate with the spirit world by creating special relationships with spirits. How do they do this, you may be asking? Well let me tell you. They use techniques that incite trance, such as singing, dancing, smoking, sword fighting, and drumming. There are only two problems I see with this method. 1. Shamans can actually worsen the curse. 2. Shamans are MYTHICAL CREATURES.

3. Say A Little Prayer – Simple. But my guess is at some point every Cleveland fan has asked for a favor from God regarding our sports teams. My guess is this method isn’t going to work. Nothing against God but some methods just don’t work for certain curses.

4. Eliminate The Source – I’m not even going to speculate what this method implies, nor do I condone any such actions. Maybe if Jim Brown would of went to Baltimore with Ozzie the curse would have been lifted.

So if The Catch, Red Right 88, The Drive, The Fumble, The Shot, and The Mesa all happened because of the curse. Its my feeling that the Curse of Cleveland isn't just a curse that causes us to lose in dramatic fashion but it is also a curse that makes us believe the curse has been lifted, a curse of false hope, a curse of deception.

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